• It's that woman again. There is nothing, absolutely nothing
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that Mrs T loves more than sitting in the driving seat and telling people what to do. It's her job.
Last week, the PM took the wheel and flagged off a scrolled message she is sending to each of the EEC's 11 capital cities telling her fellow European leaders they must do all they can to continue fighting the battle against road accidents.
As ever, Mrs Thatcher's message is blunt, and uncompromising. Yet it also recognises the scale of the problems and does not let the reader forget everyone has a certain responsibility.
"We must act" she writes. "We must continue our efforts to find solutions — in education and training, in legislation and enforcement, and particularly in vehicle and road engineering.
The scrolled message will be carried to each capital city by a different mode of transport. The 1986 bus driver of the year Connel O'Donnell will drive a Leyland Tiger coach to Brussels on the first stage, a Freight Rover Sherpa van will take the scroll to Dublin, a 32.5 tonne Leyland Roadtrain will carry the HGV flag on the Paris stage driven by Leyland's Peter Yass, a Range Rover will go to Rome and a Metro Caramel] Weymann minibus will take the message to Luxembourg. Other stages will be done on foot to represent pedestrians, by cycle and motorcycle, taxi, car and a converted Ford Escort driven by a disabled driver using hand controls only.
1985 was the safest year on Britain's roads for 30 years. Though the full, confirmed statistics are not available yet for 1986, the early indications are that the toll has gone back up again. 1987 should see the DTp telling the sorry story.
• How do you stop a secret getting out? Give it a codename, of course.
That was the idea when a team of senior National Freight Consortium managers worked on the detail of a secret and sensitive contract. Premature word of the project could have blown the whole exercise.
But what do you call it? Overlord? No, they tried that for D-day. Barbarossa? No, Hitler used it to invade Russia. They chose Antler instead, for no better reason that it was the name on a senior director's briefcase.
Eventually, on pain of extermination, other managers were let in on the secret. Provided they promised not to tell others they were told the true nature of Project Antler.
They needn't have bothered, for the customer leaked word of it to the Sunday newspapers a few days later.
And what was Project Antler? Robert Maxwell's contract with National Carriers Contract Services to take over the distribution of Mirror Group newspapers from British Rail.
• Forewarned is forearmed, they say. So let this be a cautionary tale. I recently had a call from an agitated reader, angry that the reconditioned engine he bought four weeks ago with a 12 month, 12,000 mile guarantee had blown a piston.
You might not think that is too surprising, nor the fact that the company he bought the unit from in south London has now gone out of business and his guarantee is not being honoured by the firm which has taken over the old premises. Yet it is easy to be wise until it happens to you.
The outfit which now trades in diesel engine repairs and servicing from exactly the same address as the group which went under, even has a very similar name. It took in our reader's engine for repairs hoping to continue his custom according to the new boss. The only problem being it wants £400 for putting the blown piston right. Meanwhile the reader's engine is in someone else's workshops and his truck is off the road. The hire fees he is incurring to keep his operation on the road at such a busy time of year are astronomical.
He is, in short, up the creek without a paddle. He is, in the long term, stuck with a duff engine, a large repair and downtime bill and a much more cautious buying policy. Happy Christmas.