Our cup runneth over with jOy! CM's much missed and
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by now much travelled golf day cup has been mysteriously returned to our offices in balmy or, if you ever walk down the high street, barmy. Sutton after it was halfinched on the day of our competition.
As you can see from the pic our sales team are overjoyed by the recovery. However it has taken its toll on our men. See CM southern sales manager, Dave Smith, left, his eyes glowing from industrial strength steroid use, and CM sales director, Mike Spray, a man who once Walked proud and tall, now hunched with a madman's leer.
It's been a long road to get our cup back. We have received notes and pictures showing the cup sitting in the crowd with a Union Jack bandana watching Tim Henman at Wimbledon, sitting en a luxurious armchair in between President Bush and President Putin during a top level meeting and in the cockpit of Concorde during its test flight wearing a twirly black moustache, stiff scarf and brown goggles. OK, so we're exagger
ating—we have had ransom notes for it with Birmingham and Darlington postmarks and It has been seen in the back of someone's car. It did get a trip to a Spanish holiday resort though.
It is still not clear who the robbers are. CM kept pestering police for possible identities. One eventually replied: "Try the Pink Panther, Dr Moriaty, Ronnie Biggs or Butch Cassidy and the flamin' Sundance Kid." We may never know who this Lord Lucan of larceny is—but we want him to know that we'll not forget the trauma he has caused.