Presents and Pantomime
Page 38
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Christmas as it Might be if the Minister of Transport and the Road Haulage Executive Entered Fully into the Spirit of the Season
THE law has so many unexpected twists that it would not be altogether surprising if Santa Claus were found to be carrying goods for hire or reward within the meaning of the Act. It is some comfort, therefore, that the appointed day is some time after Christmas, and that the old gentleman has not had to bother about getting a permit to cover his itinerary this year.
A welcome and seasonable gift has been made by the Road Haulage Executive to over 600 hauliers who were in danger of being harshly penalized by a technicality depriving them of the right to an original permit. The R.H.E.has found it possible, where there is hardship, to issue an ordinary permit which will put the applicant in the same position as if he had been granted an original permit.
This concession chiefly concerns operators who had lost the right to original permits because of changes in the ownership of their businesses since November 28, 1946. There is believed to be at least one case where the concession has been offered also to an operator' who, for reasons completely and demonstrably outside his control, was unable to apply for his original permit within the prescribed period.
Exactly how the trick has been done is as baffling as the running schedule of Santa Claus, for showing too great a curiosity in which children are generally chided. It may be we should take our cue from the nursery, be grateful to the R.H.E., and leave it at that.
R.H.E. as Fairy Godmother Of course, ii. the R.H.E. really put itself out, it could fill the haulier's Christmas tree with gifts. Perhaps this is too much to hope, but there are some ways in which the Executive might play the Fairy. Godmother and earn itself golden opinions without losing much. For example, difficulties arising because, under the. 1933 and 1947 Acts, the haulier has to justify his Operating centre -twice over, might largely disappear if the R.H.E. and the Railway Executive decided not to fish in these troubled waters.
It is a pleasant and inexpensive game to guess what presents other people might give. The Minister of Transport certainly might choose the Christmas season to abandon the use of form Z/F/5/A. The retention of this vehicle record form causes resentment altogether disproportionate to its value. Operators are seldom called upon to submit Z/F/5/A. The occasional irritant always seems the worst, whereas far more serious annoyances that occur regularly are less noticed.
The haulier's argument is that if the Minister, really wanted the information on the forms he would ask for it all the time. Not a very sound argument, perhaps. but it plainly shows that there is discontent which is within the power of the Minister of Transport to allay.
People who look forward to receiving gifts are some times disappointed. Many motorists no doubt were thinking recently how appropriate it was to the season of pantomime that the two good fairies Methanol and a‘t Acetone should come on to the stage prepared to thwart the magic of the Demon King, Petrol Rationing.
Nobody noticed, lurking in the wings, those two wicked fairies, the Board of Trade and the Ministry of Fuel and Power, sworn to defend the Demon King to the last drop of liquid fuel. They came forward in the green spotlight and sang a duet as in a real pantomime, except that they used prose instead of verse.
Restriction in Rhyme One is tempted to turn a few passages into rhymed couplets, just to show how little change is necessary:— " ProdUction of these two materials is limited, and the general use of them as a petrol substitute could only be at the expense of the larger number of industrial users."
This becomes: Poor Methanol and Acetone !
Your spells are nothing like our own.
"The Board of Trade would naturally be extremely reluctant to have to safeguard these industries which consume methanol and acetone, by the imposition of statutory controls."
We're (one of us) rettictant chaps Who'd hate to use our power—perhaps !
"If, however, future production increases to such an extent as to offer a prospect of making a worthwhile contribution to the fuel supplies of the country, the Ministry of Fuel and Power would wish to consider whether these materials should not be assured of an equitable distribution by being brought within the scope of the petrol-rationing scheme."
It doesn't matter what you do, The Demon King will scupper you!
In these days of dearth, there is a lesson to be learned from the statement by the Board of Trade and the Ministry of Fuel and Power, extracts from which I have possibly treated a little unkindly. The reputed substitute for petrol uses ,materials needed in other branches of industry. Most of the Christmas .gifts that one would suggest would draw protests from third parties
If the Minister of Transport announced the increase to 30 m.p.h. of the speed limit for heavy vehicles, he would please the R.H.E., the hauliers, the traders and his own Road Safety Committee, but—if one understands correctly the somewhat complicated situation— he would displease the workers. If he presented long-suffering road users with one or two really first-class roads, he would presumably incur the wrath of the Chancellor of the Exchequer.
If more vehicles were released for the home market, the Industrial Survey for 1950 would be wrecked. If passenger operators in areas threatened by schemes give away leaflets to their passengers, they run the risk of unseating all the Conservative and Liberal candidates returned at the General Election.
I think that, after alt, I shall not give all the large and expensive Christmas presents I had in mind. I might otherwise be the unwitting cause of Santa Claus receiving a summons for overloading.