Ban trucks on Sundays?
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The incoming president of the Institute of Highway Engineers wants to ban LGVs from Britain’s motorways on Sundays. Why? Because “weekends should be a relaxing time on our roads when the general public should be able to go about their leisure activities without being intimidated by heavy lorries thundering up and down our motorways”. Genius! I can’t see any flaws in this plan. Oh, hang on...
• Presumably Mr Hayes doesn’t like fresh milk on his cereal – because without trucks on a Sunday the shelves are going to be pretty bare on a Monday. Why not try and get trucks banned for a whole week? As society grinds to a halt and anarchy ensues, the public might realise how important trucks are.
• If he convinces the government, and even gets the public on his side, he’s still got the supermarkets to convince. And they’re the ones who really run the country!
• If there are no trucks on the motorway, where will they go? That’s right, the A and B roads, to be even more of an intimidation to the Sunday driver.
• What happens when a left-hooker with a dodgy sat-nav finds himself in Little Lower Puddlington, wedged between a medieval church and the Red Lion’s thatched roof? Yes, the road will close and the traffic will divert onto the motorway! It strikes me that Mr Hayes hasn’t put a lot of thought into this plan. Or was this quite simply a clever piece of self-promotion?
Maybe I should issue a press release: “CM editor Will Shiers wants bicycles banned from London’s streets on weekdays.” Except it isn’t as ridiculous!
Will Shiers