CV Burp!
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Welcome to the latest addition to CM, a sideways look at the road transport industry on telly, radio, papers and even t’interweb Sometimes CV Burp can pick on the weird and wonderful, but sometimes it just has to take its hat off to some people. This week, as CV Burp was throwing away some old magazines, it came across an issue of Empire and scant details of a man who has THE BEST JOB IN THE WORLD.
Frankly, CV Burp does not give out this accolade willy-nilly. In fact, CV Burp is on to quite a cushy number itself, living on a diet of truck-related media. But Jim Wilkey has done the kind of things in a truck that makes one greener than a Stobart trailer with envy.
Remember the Batman film Dark Knight Returns? You know the one with the actor dressed up as palefaced master of crime The Joker, then died before it came out? The best scene is when Batman chases down a truck and trailer filled with gun-toating goons only to lasoo it with Bat-rope and flip it on its nose so the whole bleeding truck is vertical. For anyone interested in seeing trucks go BOOM! it is the iconic movie scene.
Wilkey was the man who drove that truck. Yes, that’s right, Jim Wilkey is a Hollywood truck stunt driver. Try saying that three times fast after you’ve flipped a Kenworth on its nose with the trailer rigid in the fifth wheel.
CV Burp hero Wilkey also does some truck stunts in mediocre sci-fi sequel Terminator: Salvation – where a truck full of orphans or something are being chased by killer robots on bikes and a huge space plane while being shot at. Then in mind-bending blockbuster Inception, Wilkey drives a truck that is covered in metal and glass to look exactly like a train – why the A-Team never did this during a montage I have no idea – that goes on to drive through a gridlocked street full of cars in a dream, within a dream, with in a dream (whatever)... Jim Wilkey, CV Burp salutes you!
Finally, Ice Road Truckers is back! Hurrah! Channel Five at 8pm on a Friday night is clearly the truck slot. The first two episodes saw truck babe Lisa Kelly (pictured above) being told off for being a woman attempting to do a man’s job. Well, at least that’s what Andy Gray and Richard Keys said off air during the 0-0 draw between Bolton and Blackburn the other week.
CV Burp can only apologise for this cheap, obvious and out-of-date gag, but as Gray would have said: “The lad can’t miss an open goal from there.”